I started my coaching business in 2017 by myself, with no support, and I almost hit double six figures in my first full year in business. I attribute this to a few things, but here’s what I attribute it to most…

I understood how to make adjustments rapidly and keep going. I was determined to succeed. I would not be stopped. The Marine in me wouldn’t quit.

When you have to hustle and grind for something, you’re really inviting, embracing, and loving struggle and stress and pain. The hard way. You are actually embracing the path of most resistance.

When we dream small, we get small. When we dream big, we get big. Before your fear diminishes, dream big and you’ll see your fears start to diminish because of your big dreams. You’ll see that the universe – life – starts to provide based on your dreams, not your fear.

The greatest act of rebellion that a single human being can possibly demonstrate in this lifetime is to fully be yourself.  Fully embrace your authenticity, talents, gifts, and desires to fully impact the world in your special, unique way.

The people around you matter. They will ultimately determine how much you’ll grow and how successful and happy you’ll allow yourself to become. Community is everything.

True courage is the willingness to feel every emotion. Consider this emotional courage — the only true courage. I misunderstood this for a long time. 

Courage isn’t the absence of emotion, as I was taught as a little boy, a Marine, and an adult man.

The absence of emotion, or refusing to feel emotion, is pure hell and isolation. This is fear of feeling, not courage.

It’s not that I don’t care about chaos in the world…

It’s that I can’t care and still live the life I desire to live. 

I used to turn over my success, happiness, and freedom to others…

The media…

Religion…

Politics…

Economics…

Social drama…

I used to decide if I could be happy based on what was going on around me.

I never stood a chance. 

Byron Katie once said, “When we believe in our thoughts, when we tell ourselves a story, we suffer. When there’s no story, there’s no suffering.”

The stories we tell ourselves are based on our beliefs. Our beliefs create our reality, so when we decide to believe painful things, we are making the decision to choose a painful life.

Do you believe you can have it all without killing yourself?

You have dreams of being able to enjoy life, but you still find yourself sacrificing each day. You still do things that you “have to” do to keep it all together.  Can you imagine living a life you “get to” live instead of one you “have to” live? I’m talking about enjoying 100% of every single aspect of how you show up in your love life, in your health, in your relationships, and in your business.

Desire is natural and healthy. Desire or wanting more is genetic hunger, a life expanding itself through you. If you pretend you don’t want more, or that you don’t desire things, you’re only lying to yourself.

I’ve never found glory in hard work, working hard, or sacrifice. I’ve worked hard and took the path of most resistance many times in my life, but it sucked and deep down I knew I was acting out others’ ideas of what life’s supposed to look like.

Life loves you. It really does. Life's your biggest fan. Your prayers are already answered.

You might not believe it, but life wants the very best for you, and life wants you to have whatever you want.

If you don’t have what you want it’s because you don’t trust life.

And it’s lack of trust in life that makes life so difficult.

Just stop fighting.

I’ve lived in shame of my body.

I’ve lived in shame of my hidden gluttonous urges.

I’ve lived in shame of my memory of insignificant details.

I’ve lived in shame of my shame.

I’ve lived in shame of my talents and gifts.

I’ve lived in shame of not being perfect or not knowing.

I’ve lived in shame of my desire to accumulate wealth.

I’ve lived in shame of having everything I need, and still wanting more.

I’ve lived in shame of being molested.

You are not here to live anyone else’s vision for your life. Yes, you play a part in others’ stories, but you are not here to be whom they decide you can be.

You get to figure that out all on your own, and then others get to decide if they want to continue in your story.

Likewise, no one is here to comply with your wishes or expectations.

Life is not about unnecessary stress and struggle. As human beings, we are addicted. We seek it out.

Life never needs to be hard and you don’t need to sacrifice your life, health, or family for your dreams and your enjoyment.

Seriously.

Do only things you love. Get clear about what you desire.

Embrace what you deserve and expect it to show up for you.

Receive it when it shows up.

Throw a party and celebrate and be grateful for the awesomeness you are and the process of creation you get to enjoy!

I’ve struggled with many things in my life, but most of my stress and struggles revolved around food, money, sex, and God.

Let me explain.

One time I was asked to counsel and provide support for a group of business partners. They were struggling to align in the vision for their business and in their trust of one another.

I don’t believe that struggle is a necessary part of life, and here’s why:

Life contains natural turbulence. Life is certainly not a smooth ride where everything goes according to expectations and plans.

I view it as similar to getting on a plane. We choose our destination before the flight. We sit down buckle up and pull out our search-a-word book. The plane takes off and the seatbelt sign goes off. At some point, the captain says, “there’s going to be a little turbulence, so I’m turning the seatbelt sign back on.” Then we bump around for a bit and survive the turbulence. The plane lands.

When we started our professional development business, my wife Angie and I had two outcomes in mind:

Success and happiness.

We were tired of the hustle and the spinning wheel of career torture and sacrifice and wanted to enjoy ALL of life, not just some of it.

Today, I woke up on my own terms, carried out my morning routine on my own terms, got in a lift on my own terms, then Angie and I went on a 2-hour walk. We stopped at a coffee shop along the way.

This is not a vacation day. Just an average day in our life.

Every discussion I have leads back to health, wealth, identity, and love. It always comes down to these four factors. When I speak with business owners who are struggling or have big goals, everything they want can be tied back to one of these areas, and sometimes they don’t understand that it’s not those things that they are seeking, but rather to show up in a state of internal, personal power. Internal power will unlock and open every door you desire to have opened. The answer is always inside, yet we always seem to look on the outside.