Living according to Your Own compass
Eight years ago, I hit the reset button on my life. For 43 years, I followed an inauthentic path designed for me by others. I looked around, and instead of seeing a reflection of who I truly was, I saw someone struggling to fit into a mold that wasn’t mine. My choices and actions had been shaped by what others told me was “success.”
Deep down, I knew something was missing. I was struggling in every aspect of my life.
Realizing the Blueprint Wasn’t Mine
I tried to fit into a blueprint that just didn’t feel right. My career in corporate America was a perfect example. Every organization I joined, I eventually found myself at the head of the table. But I wasn’t meant to be just another employee. I was born to create, to lead, to build something uniquely mine.
Growing up, I inherited a blue-collar mentality from my father, a union steelworker. Hard work was valued above all else. But I saw family members criticize those who had created wealth and freedom for themselves. They believed that success made people arrogant. But in reality, I was more like those “successful” family members than I was like the blue-collar side I grew up with. I wanted something different, something that reflected who I truly was.
Breaking Free from Toxic Patterns
My journey wasn’t just about my career; it was about transforming every area of my life. At home, I was in a toxic marriage filled with anger and conflict. It was all I had ever seen modeled growing up, so I assumed it was normal. But it never felt right. I wanted peace, connection, and harmony with my partner. Yet, each day I returned home to more chaos.
By 2016, my life had hit a breaking point. I was fired from my second executive position in less than two years, and I found myself spiraling. My marriage was strained, I was pushing 300 pounds, and I was buried under unhealthy habits. For the first time, I paused and asked myself: What do I truly want?
The Power of Clarity
I realized I didn’t just want wealth; I wanted wealth that was meaningful, created from a place of purpose and from intention. I didn’t just want a career; I wanted a business that would positively impact others. I wanted a relationship that lifted me up rather than dragged me down. And I wanted true health, a life filled with energy and vitality.
When I first defined what I wanted, it felt completely out of reach. But I had a mentor who told me to dream authentically, to aim high, and to believe in the possibility of my vision. So that’s what I did. I allowed myself to believe I could create a life I loved, a life of my own design.
Living the Dream
Now, eight years later, I’m living that dream. I have a business that impacts people around the world, a relationship rooted in love and respect, and a life filled with peace and joy. None of this came easily, but it all came from a place of alignment with who I truly am.
When I work with clients, I often see how hard it can be for people to dream, especially if their “dream valve” was shut off long ago. But that’s the work we must do. We have to turn that valve back on and reconnect with our dreams, our desires, and our true selves.
Transforming Limiting Beliefs
I was raised in a family culture of guilt, shame, and the belief that life was about suffering and sacrifice. The people I loved most modeled and taught me that life was a place full of struggle, conflict, and chaos. They regularly looked to see where life was dangerous, and when they looked for it they found it. Whatever we look for in this world we find.
It took me years to realize that none of this is true. Life isn’t against us. Life wants for us what we want for ourselves. All we have to do is get clear on our vision and open ourselves up to the possibility of receiving it. Whatever we look for in this world we find.
The Challenge: Define Your Vision
Here’s my challenge to you: Take some time today to get clear about what you want in four areas—your health, your wealth, the impact you want to make in the world, and your relationships. Grab a piece of paper, let go of any doubt or fear, and start writing down what you really desire.
When you open yourself up to clarity, you’ll be amazed at the power you hold within. The life you envision might seem far off, but trust me, it’s closer than you think. Once you start the journey toward your vision, there’s no going back. You’ll see your potential, and you won’t be able to unsee it.
Living Authentic and Unapologetic
So, here’s my invitation to you: Think authentically. Live authentically. And if you find that you don’t want the same things everyone else wants, celebrate it. It means you’re unique, an individual with a vision and purpose all your own.
You don’t have to follow anyone else’s blueprint. You get to create your own life, a life that reflects exactly who you are.
Take the leap. You won’t regret it.